i so appreciate when people read/hear what is actually said and respond appropriately instead of inflicting their unresolved damaged psyches on what they hear/read. :)

i have to leave my daughter in Gods hands on the one hand, and be in earnest prayer on the other to learn how to reach out to her, to make her feel safe.

You mentioned also having to leave your daughter in God's hands; and I think that that has to be one of the hardest things in all this kind of thing for a parent to do. It sounds like you really love your children - they probably know that, and it will pay great dividends some day. Thanks for having the courage to share what you did.

yes, those who hurt others just blunder along never aware of the pain and destruction they have left behind, even reacting in absolute amazement when seeing it figuring it was really the victims fault, just like the rape victim.

if the rape victim hadnt.....she wouldnt have been raped. make the victim responsible for the behavior of the perpetrator, not hold the perpetrator responsible.

too bad this is a no-quotes forum, perhaps we are still children of the darkness instead of children of the light.

((((Teresa)))) and ((((her Daughter)))) will definately put both of ya'll on my prayer list.

MODERATOR POST -


My, how things can quickly get sidetracked...

Just to let those who have been particpating in this topic recently, you will notice a fair bit missing. I have removed the posts from the point of the derailment to get this back on track. Some connected responses get removed as well in the process.

Carry on!

Tom

Shane; you make a good point. Although it is a sad commentary how that many who are wronged by the church in some way have turned to booze and drugs; it is a good testimony regarding your personal experience with the verse which says: If a man will have friends; he should show himself friendly..

I do not intend to take away your point there; I have only been trying to say that in some cases; where even all the right things are done; it becomes the opposite of good news.

I will state a friendly challenge to all the "editing" Tom has just done in this thread. Some of us have had some unfriendly interactions here on the forum with one another; and here in this topic, we did digress somewhat; but we were actually "mending the fence" and having a little fun together. To me it was an important "first step" in making things right - his deletions seemed to ignore the good that was happening, in favor of "the rules." Now where have we seen that in the church before?

There isn't any other Church we can go to where this kind of thing does not take place. Thankfully; it is not as easy to delete people's feelings, and right desires. More Churches/church members should remember that.

i was thinking the exact same thing! but got distracted. i thought it was a good thing also.

and thank you, liz! God knows we need it!

I try to stay focused on the topic of whatever thread I am contributing to. I try not to respond specifically to individuals. When I do, I call them by name and it is normally in the prayer section or light-hearted threads.

People have been wronged in the Adventist church... HOWEVER... can anyone name a church or religious organization that has never harmed any of its members? Is the Adventist church really any different than other religious bodies in that respect? I think not. We are all sinners. None of us are perfect. So from time to time we (as a group) are going to make mistakes and hurt people within our own ranks. I know I have been hurt by others in the church and suspect that I have probably hurt others myself too.

That's right olger. It's like the disciples said when the Lord asked if they would leave him too- where would we go? It is what it is.

For me, my ultimate decision to leave Adventism wasn't because I was hurt. I certainly have that as part of my story, but it is not the reason. Bitterness and resentment are pretty harmful for me to stay in no matter what an individual or organization has done.

Shane is right in that every organization, by its nature, is going to disenfranchise some.

My ultimate reason to leave Adventism was because I no longer, in good conscience, could support what it was teaching. I know there are very loving and caring people in the Adventist church and that is not the issue.

The issue for me, is that most Christian organizations are based on fear and, to me, that is not something I want to spread. That's the deal breaker.